Ephphatha

i am kind of scared these days- well maybe that is not the right term for what I am feeling. we are finally at the point of signing our lease for the fire garage- should be doing it next week thursday. this itself is not the scary part- what is scary is that once we sign the lease, we will then have to begin the process of renovation- a process that will cost a lot of money- we are guessing around 30,000- money we do not exactly have. yet, the synod says- press on, go forward on faith- the money will come…blah blah blah :-) i do have faith that the money will come- we have already been blessed with much more mission support than could have been expected- but the problem is the sub-contractors need to be paid- especially the electrician and heating guys who will cost the most….so….yeah, i guess scared is a good word. any ideas where i can find 30 grand? anyone’s church want to loan us the money- or get a loan for us? just checking- that’s what the bishop said to do!

on a personal front-i am scared a bit as well- just got word yesterday that my father is in the hospital with a heart and lung problem. most of you who read this are aware that my parents both have long suffered from problems with addiction- my mom has been clean for almost 3 years- praise to god. my dad, well not so clean- evidently he went on a pretty bad binge of drugs and alcohol the last week since seeing us last wednesday, and this led to his heart becoming enlarged and his lungs filling with fluid- basically the doctor told him he is lucky to be alive and he must stop using or he will surely die soon. now…i am not sure how one is to feel in a situation like this- i love my dad, always have and always will but i am pretty pissed at him right now- i mean wake up- you got grandkids and all that- but i know he suffers from a disease so i feel bad for being angry. god help us all!

so yeah, i share this simply because i value all your prayers and thoughts, and because it helps me process a bit to write. peace to all of you.

jg

first of all, sorry for the lack in updating since our sunday night discussion regarding the church. to summarize the night- was not really at all what i expected- did not bring a lot of new people in (4) but did end up being exactly what we needed as a community. we ate- lots of good food, and then about 45 of us sat in a circled and shared our stories- where we have been, why we were there, and what it was that had held some back from being part of the church. the word of the night was "welcome"- they were sitting in that circle, invested in Advent simply because they always feel as if they are welcome- the most important person in the world one said- when they walk through the doors of our community. we have people from about every background possible, people at various points of faith- some still not sure they "buy" into this blind faith stuff, yet they continue to come, to come with questions and passion to learn, and to be part of something bigger than themselves. i am humbled to be called the pastor of this group. the evening helped me focus more on my vision for the next six months- we are going to start education, as well as have small group meetings in people's homes to vision together about what we want to be. after these meetings we will come together again for a large community dinner once again. hopefully, down the road we will advertise "hate church?" again to bring in those that wish to come and talk.

in retrospect, it was an amazing night, one that gave me much needed energy and excitement. this energy has been contagious i feel to the rest of our group. this past sunday we had two baptisms- payton's being one of them. the assistant to the bishop (my boss) came to baptize payton and preach. he was greeted by 130 friendly faces (46 kids). not a bad showing! our town hall was packed, and now we are trying to figure out what to do if our growth continues as it is- we are running out of space- good problem. tonight as well was a surprise at what god is up to- we expected about 30 people for supper and worship, and were greeted by 65. i can not begin to say how amazed i am at the goodness of god and what god is doing- holy crap, and to think i get to be part of this- wow wow wow.